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Monday, November 30, 2009

Post-Op Appointment

I literally just returned from my post-op appointment.  It went well!  They are really happy with my weight loss so far.  The doctor peeled off all my steri-strips, except those for my port incision, and said I can start using Mederma.  I also scheduled my first fill...not until December 28th!!!!  I'm going to die!!!!!

The doctor asked if I was having any problems and I told him about my starvation through the clear liquids.  He said I can advance my diet (which, as you all know, I already did on Saturday) to full liquids which includes thick soups, liquid eggs, watery oatmeal, etc.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

9 Days Post Op

I got back from FL last night so I was finally able to step on the scale this morning. Down 9lb. since the 20th! I'm excited about that.

I also took myself off the clear liquids and started full liquids (i.e. mushies) yesterday. The clear liquids just weren't hacking it. I know it's a week early, but if I stayed on clear liquids, I would have had less weight loss or perhaps gained weight just to stop from being so freaking hungry!

The increase in hunger began about Wednesday...5 days post op. I think the swelling in my stomach was starting to subside so the liquids weren't taking as long to go in my stomach and just weren't staying in there.

Last night I purchased mashed potatoes from KFC, and hummus and liquid eggs from TJ's. The hummus is just what I needed.

Tomorrow is my post-op appointment. I anticipate they will be looking at my incisions (steri-strips came off one incision and really want to come off the rest) and will schedule my first fill! I hope it's before Christmas or I will be eating the house by then!

Monday, November 23, 2009

I'm alive! I made it!!!!!

Ohhhhh, the horror. I haven't updated in about a week, I think. Not so sure.

Let me tell you, though, blogging has been the last thing on my mind since surgery on Friday afternoon. I don't know how all of you did who already had the procedure, but I had a really, really hard time Friday night, Saturday, and much of Sunday. Today (Monday), I'm feeling much more like myself!

My surgery wasn't until 3:15 on Friday so I didn't get home until after 6. They wouldn't let me have more than a small shot glass of ice chips all night. I was so mad and so thirsty! I really just wanted to chug some water, but wasn't allowed to have a full glass until Saturday.

The worst part for me has been the gas. None of my loosest pants would fit after surgery. They are finally starting to fit. The gas pain was horrendous. A lot of it was around where your heart would be. So, it felt like my heart was hurting! It was also up under my ribcage.

Eating hasn't been a big deal. I can't get all my food in, so that's difficult. What's also difficult is being around my parents. We came down to our beach house in FL yesterday and on the way down they had these delicious pita sandwiches filled with eggs, ham, mushrooms, and mozzarella. I had hot tea. Last night, they had Carraba's spaghetti, bread and oil, and a house salad for dinner. I had a protein drink. The whole time they were eating they were like, "Mmm, this is soooo good." blah, blah, blah. I'm sure they weren't doing it on purpose but have a little sensitivity! I wanted to punch them in the face! This morning they had eggs, bacon, toast, and avocado. I had a popsicle. Ugh! See where this is going?

In terms of activity, I'm doing really well. Even the night I got home I wanted the gas OUT! Talk about serious pain. So, I've been walking, walking, walking. It's not all gone, but at least I'm making headway with beginning to pass it (TMI). For example, right now I'm sitting upright (which is a challenge. I really want to slouch) and I feel it in my lower abdomen. I'm just glad it's not high up in my abdomen anymore. That was the worst!

Right now I'm at Starbucks because our internet connection at the beach house is out for some reason. My parents dropped me off here to get a little work done while they run errands. I got a small nf sf vanilla chai latte. I have barely made a dent in it and I've had it sitting next to me for about 45 minutes. It's that hard to get stuff down.

Before I was saying how I was just looking forward to having the procedure and seeing how it goes from there. Now, I'm looking forward to being back at 100% and beginning to see results! I haven't stepped on a scale since surgery so I have no idea where I'm at. I think that's a good thing. I want to hold off on being a slave to the scale as long as possible.

Well, if you made it through all of my rambling, thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I'll try to update again this week, but if I can't, it will be next week!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

3 more days!

I'm getting so gosh darn excited. Surprisingly, I'm not nervous at all. Ask me again on Thursday evening, though.

Update on the pre-op diet: I hate it. Protein officially sucks unless it's in shake form. I received 5 samples from Chike nutrition and they are delicious! Otherwise, I hate meals. I basically eat to feel full, definitely not for taste.

I still really need to get my room in order. I don't want to have a lot to do when I get back from recouping at the beach. I need to finish my laundry, change my sheets, and clean / vacuum.

Last night I got my pain meds from the pharmacy. Is it bad when the people at Target Pharmacy know you by name? I think so. I'm hoping that changes over the next few months. I'm hoping that my prescriptions will be greatly reduced due to my weight loss.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Holla.

Weekends are soooo hard for me in terms of eating correctly. I totally flubbed yesterday (and kind of this morning).

Yesterday I woke up craving carbs. Like, I would kill someone if I did not get something flour-based in my stomach immediately. I know myself and if I don't give in to the craving, I'm going to screw up even worse for the rest of the day. So, I went to McD's and got hot cakes. Felt much better.

I did better the rest of the day, except for last night. I had an oven pizza. Not all of it, not even half of it, but I did eat all of the cheese and pepperoni off of it. I was watching my favorite college football game of the year and was really craving pizza (we didn't win, btw, but came soooooo close). I can tell my stomach is shrinking already. Normally, I can eat a whole oven pizza no problem. Last night, I definitely could not and I really wasn't into the dough and crust. Anyway, so I effed up.

I know cheating is bad and, if done too horribly I run the risk of not being banded, but I'm not concerned about one day. Especially since many people don't have a pre-op at all and many do cheat just a smidge. I'm back on track today! Ready to finish strong and get my band. I can't believe it's just 5 short days away.

This morning I met my family at Waffle House for breakfast to say goodbye to my sister, niece, and my sister's fiance until Christmas. Everyone had HUGE portions and massive amounts of food. Not me! I had 2 eggs over medium and two sausage patties. It was PERFECT.

This week I'm looking forward to getting all my stuff together for being at the beach for 10 days, going to the gym to burn some extra fat, and maybe, just maybe an interview! Please keep your fingers crossed for me!

<3

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Pre-Op Diet Day 5

I have been on the pre-op diet for 5 days and have lost 5lb already!

I've been hating the pre-op, but stepping on the scale and seeing results makes it all worth while. I crave carbs. I do.

Last night, however, I decided to stop by TJ's (Trader Joe's) and pick up delicious high-protein foods. I bought shrimp, salmon, Dr. Praeger's veggie burgers, and lean buffalo burgers. I'm hoping that maybe I just need some variety in my life!

Last night I had some of the shrimp. I prefer fresh, caught that day shrimp, but these will do in a pinch. Not too bad. Today, for lunch, I'm going to have a Dr. Praeger's Tex Mex burger...mmmmmmm. Can't wait!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Pre-Op Appt and Pre-Op Diet Update

I had my pre-op appointment yesterday! I thought I would go in, listen to a group seminar, then go back and meet my surgeon. Not so! I filled out my pre-op paperwork, signed my life away, and was immediately called back to meet my surgeon, Dr. Hart. I had heard that Dr. Hart was a man of very few words and was not very personable. I found that to be completely false! He was awesome! I was able to fire off all my questions at him and he answered them just as I'd hoped. He gave me my prescriptions and sent me on my way. My surgery time was scheduled and it's not until freaking 3pm in the afternoon on a Friday! Geez!

I also started my pre-op diet on Monday. It's been fairly easy except dinner. My sister, her fiance, and my niece are in town. We've been gathering for dinner at my parents house each night and I made my mom aware of my dietary requirements. She has tried. She really has, but it's been so hard to watch them eat delicious bread and butter, salad, cheese, etc. when I have to eat plain lean meat and a veggie. I JUST WANT SOME BREAD AND BUTTER, DAMN IT! So, I'm going back to my house tonight. It's better to remove myself from the situation.

I'm getting excited, though. I took my pre-op weight and measurements the other day. I need to take a few "before" pics and I'll be set!

Friday, November 6, 2009

Shame.

Ever since I've pushed beyond 230lb I have become a shut-in. I run essential errands and go to work, but really do anything else. I don't go shopping, to movies, out to eat with friends, to parties, or to bars anymore.

I used to be WILD. I'd go out several times during the week, stay out until 2 or 4am and then get up and go to work. However, ever since my weight has ballooned, I have no desire. So these last few years have been awful for me! I don't know that I will ever be as wild as I once was (I chalk it up to being in my early 20s), but it would be really nice to be able to go out and not be so self-conscious.

I don't like people looking at me in this state. I don't like seeing thin people having a good time b/c it just reminds me of how I got to this point. I look forward to finally being banded and being on my way to having a social life, again!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Blogger = The Suck Right Now

I have no clue what is going on, but beginning yesterday Blogger has started screwing up for me and I can't post comments! UGH!!!! I'm reading all your entries, I just can't post comments.

Other news. I was reading the Post-Op section on LBT and people are saying their surgeon has told them no more Advil, ever. Well, if I were a superhero, I would be Advil Woman. That's how much Advil I take. I have migraines several times a week, often for up to 7 days solid and Advil is one of my staples, along with prescription meds. I will DIE if I can't take my Advil!

Just add it to the list of things I can no longer have after being banded:
-Advil
-Soda (I'm also a Diet Coke fiend)
-Bread
-Steak
-Shrimp

How depressing! The things we do for vanity / health.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Starting the final stretch!

Yesterday I went to my surgeon's office for one of the last two visits I'll have prior to surgery Well, technically I had 3 left, but only 2 at my surgeon's office. The other will be at the surgery facility a few days prior to surgery because I have to meet with and answer questions from the anesthesiologist. Odd, I know.

The purpose of my visit yesterday was to have my final bloodwork done (my last bloodwork done there was in July) and to square away my financing.

When it got down to the financing, CareCredit only gave me $12,600 of the $14,500 I needed. SOB!!!! Luckily, my surgeon's office offers a second financing for those of us who don't get all the money we need. It's the same interest rate, however I have to pay it off in 36 months instead of 60. I think that will be better, anyway!

I won't know for a few days if I'm approved for the extra $1,900. It's not an instant approval like CareCredit.

Here's hoping!

Next step: Pre-Op diet starts this weekend and I have my Pre-Op appt where I finally meet my surgeon on the 10th!

Monday, November 2, 2009

Happy November!

We've finally reached my banding month! I'm so excited! 18 days! Holy shish-kabobs!

I have been unable to find Liquid Tylenol without it being Children's Tylenol...any ideas?

This weekend my tennis team had our first round of playoffs. We've already won our division, now we're just working our way to City Finals. We weren't able to play on Saturday as planned due to the craptastic weather. So, we played yesterday. It was so exciting. We won the first match, lost the next two, then, as I was playing my match, we won another match...so it all came down to my match. After 3 sets, we won! Now we proceed to round 2 of playoffs on Saturday!

I'm kind of excited that I was able to clinch the win for us. It feels awesome! What does not feel awesome is my body. My left foot is killing me today. It's the plantar fascitis. I can't wait to lose some of this weight. I'm sure the issue will alleviate itself.

Also, one of my teammates deemed herself the official team photographer yesterday to document our amazing season. She posted the photos last night and, boy, they are not pretty. See for yourself:

OMG. When I saw those, I wanted to DIE. I look so freaking gross (except my sunglasses...they are fab-u-lous).

I think another one of the things that has gotten me here (all 260lbs of me) is that I have kind of a reverse body dysmorphia. Most people with body dysmorphic disorder are thin and see themselves as fat. When I look in the mirror, I see myself about 30 - 40lb thinner than what I really am and really only see the evidence of just how truly obese I am in pictures. In my head, I feel like as long as no one takes a picture of me, no one will see me like as I really am. So sad.