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Monday, November 2, 2009

Happy November!

We've finally reached my banding month! I'm so excited! 18 days! Holy shish-kabobs!

I have been unable to find Liquid Tylenol without it being Children's Tylenol...any ideas?

This weekend my tennis team had our first round of playoffs. We've already won our division, now we're just working our way to City Finals. We weren't able to play on Saturday as planned due to the craptastic weather. So, we played yesterday. It was so exciting. We won the first match, lost the next two, then, as I was playing my match, we won another match...so it all came down to my match. After 3 sets, we won! Now we proceed to round 2 of playoffs on Saturday!

I'm kind of excited that I was able to clinch the win for us. It feels awesome! What does not feel awesome is my body. My left foot is killing me today. It's the plantar fascitis. I can't wait to lose some of this weight. I'm sure the issue will alleviate itself.

Also, one of my teammates deemed herself the official team photographer yesterday to document our amazing season. She posted the photos last night and, boy, they are not pretty. See for yourself:

OMG. When I saw those, I wanted to DIE. I look so freaking gross (except my sunglasses...they are fab-u-lous).

I think another one of the things that has gotten me here (all 260lbs of me) is that I have kind of a reverse body dysmorphia. Most people with body dysmorphic disorder are thin and see themselves as fat. When I look in the mirror, I see myself about 30 - 40lb thinner than what I really am and really only see the evidence of just how truly obese I am in pictures. In my head, I feel like as long as no one takes a picture of me, no one will see me like as I really am. So sad.

2 comments:

Lap Band It said...

I have the same problem... I look at myself in the mirror and think....Girl U Look Good..... until I see pictures. All my friends are skinny so in pictures I look HUGE next to them. It's good you play tennis. That will be good exercise for you after your surgery. Also, Love the Glasses! Very Diva :) If you haven't found the liquid Tylenol look at Walmart. That's where I found mine. It's located with the other pain medication. Good Luck. Band-It Girl

Yana said...

Just been reading over your blog entries - I've been talking about having reverse body image dysmorphia for years! I think it is why I have failed at so many weight loss plans - I forget why I am dieting.

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