I'm so depressed today. 1. It's my first day back at work after being off for TEN days 2. Yesterday I left my family in ATL. While I know ATL is not where I'm meant to be, it still makes me so sad to leave my parents. Sometimes, I second guess myself and wonder if I could be happy being back in ATL. I know that moving back would make many things in my life so much easier, but the reality is that I probably would not be as happy. I'm sure I'll have these thoughts for many years to come as I come back to ATL for visits.
A quick run down of my holidays: had my debit card information stolen and $600 worth of charges at Target were made until my bank flagged it, went to the family beach house for a few days where it was def. too cold for beach weather, went back up to my parents house for a few days and was super busy, and drove 40 hours in 7 days...that is not fun, my friends!!! While in ATL I did get a fill...not as much as was taken out just before Thanksgiving. I'm now at 7cc in a 10cc band.
The nurse practitioner seems to think I've developed a hiatal hernia since my surgery due to the problems I've been having and my reflux. Good news is that if I do have the hernia, the corrective surgery would be covered by insurance (I'm currently self-pay for all things bariatric). Bad news is that it would take many many tests to see if I do in fact have it and hurdles to submit to insurance. I just don't have the time to explore this right now considering I work in another state M-F. On top of that, I now have an HMO so would have to go to a PCP whom I've never been to just to get the upper GI series ordered. Ew.
This morning, in an effort to jump start my weight loss for the year, I signed up for Weight Watchers. This time, I'm going to go to meetings! I truly hope I can stay motivated and record my food whether I eat good or bad. My downfall in the past has always been my reluctance to journal my food when I binge. The new program seems pretty different and when I first saw how many points I get, I was a little shocked, but then learned that something that was 4 points a year ago may be more now, so I guess it all comes out in the wash!
Also, just wanted to mention that my therapist is amazing! I haven't seen her in about 2 weeks due to my traveling for work and the holidays, but she really makes me feel validated in many of my thoughts and is incredibly supportive. I can't believe I waited so long to go to her!